Portrait of the Writer as a Boy Dork

"I'm a fart-smeller!" 

Hello guys and girls! What you've landed on is not a blog about me, per-se. It's a blog about the eight-year-old version. It's about the little dork I was in all of his uncouth, untamed wildness, brainy stupidity, and humiliating openness. It's about a pleasure seeker, a treasure hunter, and a noble heart. It's a commentary on boyhood from someone glad to have lived it (and survived). We all had some strange ideas as kids, but the various workings and non-workings of this brain from the years 1990 and 1998 probably produced some of the "noblest" you've heard. So like I say, here I will post my (rather peculiar) kidhood thoughts straight from that freaky mind to your squarish screen, for your enjoyment and/or repulsion.

Let me introduce myself though. My name is Mark. I'm 24 years old [at the time I write this!], and I really don't have much to say that would matter. I'm whiter than Wonderbread, middle-class, and male... so what could I possibly have to complain about? Even so, that's as typical as I get. The rest of me is some odd mesh of book worm, writer, artist, audiophile (that means "music lover" you wingnut!), and classic movie fan. I read books about philosophy, wax on AND off, and enjoy the calm comforts of nostalgia, hot coffee (dark roast), food, sleeping, the company of chicks, and every now and then a good fart noise. Now that's quite a mix fer sure, but I'd like to think that I'm pretty much a "dork" through and through. I'm a simple guy. That's all. I like to joke around and always was a bit of a class clown. This site is really just a continuation of that. 

Now let me get something straight: I don't do the whole "anger issues" thing here... I celebrate my 90s childhood! "Dork" should not be a pejorative term! I wear it like a badge of honor (in a manner of speaking). It's a lifestyle. It's genetic... maybe. It's freedom to be what you are. According to Urban Dictionary, a dork is:

Someone who has odd interests, and is often silly at times. A dork is also someone who can be themselves and not care what anyone thinks.

Dorks are typically more noted for their quirky personality and behavior rather than their interests or IQ which may or may not be on level with traditional geeks or nerds. They tend to be more humorous and extroverted and don't mind laughing at themselves or with others at themselves, as the case may be.

So we got no reason to hate on the dorks. Bland is boring. If you can't laugh at yourself, then... well, you get that idea. I think we should celebrate what makes us unique. Are we dorks not human? Kick us, do we not say... "oof!"? Unique... yeah, that's what you can call it.

History will remember the name Enterprise. Welcome aboard.  --Admiral Mark